All Matters of Dopeness (Musings and Comedy in Erie's World)

🎶 Let's talk about sex baby, let's talk about you and me, let's talk about all the good things and the bad things that could be...let's talk about sex.  Let's talk about sex.  🎶 Since sex is always a hot topic and because people are either always doing it, trying to do it-- ya know--the sex, or thinking about doing it, I figure we can at least talk about it.  Well, maybe we can just scratch the surface by looking at a few things that lead to sex: attraction, pheromones, and Hennessy. Attraction, pheromones and Hennessy (which will mean brown liquor or any alcohol in genera in this blog article) each have the capacity to affect your feelings, and those feelings dictate actions and behaviors for a lot of people. Although, its  based on a person's individual make up, I don't think we can deny that attraction on any level, pheromones, and Hennessy enable us to be more open to situations and people we should not otherwise entertain.  As a matter-of-fact, the...

"Platonic friendship works best between members of the opposite sex when at least one of them is gay..." That's what my married male friend told me a few years ago after one of my "platonic" male friends started acting crazy.  Maybe there is some truth in the statement, though?  Historically, I have maintained that not only were co-ed platonic friendships possible, but were actually normative but I've changed my mind.  Pheromones is a helluva drug.   Maybe its possible, but not so much.  Sure, there are times when two friends are low key feeling each other and end up together like the movie  Brown Sugar (rare unicorn moments) .   However, it is more likely that two friends have some weird love story playing out based on mutual attraction and basic smashing (where one person doesn't want much else) like in the video  Half Crazy  by Musiq, where one person is lying about just being friends like in "Just a Friend" by Biz Markie, or where two peo...

Last year was rough.  Most of us agree with the memes going around that say "Forget 2016". In fact, we started giving 2016 the side-eye when David Bowie died, and by the time Phife Dawg died and Prince died, we were pretty much done with 2016.  The next thing you know the whole country took a "L", suffered a loss, with Trump being elected, and with Zsa Zsa, Rickie Harris and George Michael dying towards the end we are all like "Forget 2016".  Truly, 2016 was the year of taking a loss, the year of the L.   With that said, some of these non-grim reaper-type L's people took for loss of love or unrequited love in 2016 were well deserving or simply a part of life, not warranting dramatic displays of grief, and yet folk were straight clowning! So...while we are gathered here today to talk about this thing called life, we also have to talk about how some of y'all need to learn to take those L's correctly in 2017.  Consider this a crash course on the e...

Can solid, monogamous, healthy relationships develop between black men & women in 2016? Its aint looking good for the home team. I have grown exhausted of hearing sistas say there are no good, employed, straight, educated, professional black men. The question for me lately has been: "Do they even know when they've come across one"? I wonder if some are so oblivious, self-absorbed, damaged and high post that they overlook good men right in their eyesight? Or maybe some are looking for an Idris, a Common, or a Hill Harper...or...for a brother to drop "dollars and sense" on them or "shell out that dough" as one said to me? At 40 years old I have had a few long lasting relationships, those unfortunately ended, but chivalry definitely wasn't the issue. What I have learned through those experiences and over time, though, is that the ingredients for a good relationship are friendship and communication. A true fondness for one another as individuals is...

More than likely you've been in a situation where you had a significant heart break that prompted you to become a little loose with your standards--hopefully not, but you may have thought about it.  Maybe you decided never to love again or some dramatic equivalent or perhaps you just wandered into a shady and unsavory situation due to several factors.  We all have had our experiences.  Sometimes people jump into multiple relationships. Some people hide from love and sabotage themselves going forward.  Some people get hurt by heathens because they fail to walk away from stuff they should have never engaged.  Hopefully, this article will serve as a way for you to shake yourself and regroup as you remind yourself just how dope you really are!  While tongue in cheek, there is some help or at least comic relief for you. I'm Sorry.  I'm Just Not Your Type. Lets explore that one time you were sad or lonely or bored or...whatever and you decided to hang out wi...

(Written by Anonymous.... Many thanks xo) I met him one summer while studying at an HBCU in VA. He was funny, flirty and gave me the attention that showed me he was attracted to me. I was 16 but mature enough to recognize what I was feeling. He was a short funny guy with a Brooklyn accent and New York slang. He and I lived on different coasts so when our program ended we knew we wouldn’t see each other again unless it was planned. We kept in touch, in the days before rapid text messaging; we talked on the phone for 3 hours at a time whispering under covers at night or in the bathroom after my family had fallen asleep. I hadn’t had a long-term relationship in high school or dated anyone seriously before this so it was a big deal to me that we kept in touch after summer, through winter and into the spring. I had been accepted to a school on the East Coast, and my mother and I planned a visit during my spring break. Of course, we planned to see each other and counted down the days til ...

"Keep ya head up (what), Keep ya head (that's right) Whenever this life gets tough you gotta fight With my home girls standing to my left and my right True Blue...And Tight Like Glue" One of my favorite television shows back in the day "Living Single". It was based on four women who were not only roommates and family (or like family) but were also really good friends. The theme music says it all: "In a nineties kinda world I'm glad I got my girls". The show chronicled their journey through life together, and it allowed the audience to see the characters' flaws, disagreements, fall outs and reconciliations as time went on. This show was sisterhood in action. Nowadays there is no show on television that compares to it. Today's shows portray women gossiping, fighting, trying to steal each other's men, etc.... I guess whether it is "Living Single" from the nineties or some ratchet show today--art imitates life? I wonder if i...