In general, I barely watch television but when I have an opportunity I love a throw back black sitcom--hands down. I especially like "Living Single" and watch it as much as I can...well, at least when I have access to cable. The show is the joint! I mean, you have four sisters and a couple of good brothers just doing life together. They kick it hard; they have each other's backs and have a great time simply living life. (It's like the black version of "Friends". Actually "Friends" is the white version of "Living Single" when we think about what came out first.) What is significant to me is the bond that the women have. Even the theme song says that they are "true blue and tight like glue". That is how it should be, so with this in mind (as well as a few other things) I have concluded that something is a little bit off in how we as women treat our sisterhood nowadays.
Sometimes it seems as if we have forgotten how to genuinely care for one another and have instead given over to jealousy, competition, and general foolishness on a-whole-nother extra level. I guess there are times when we need reminders that REAL friendship flows from true hearts and decent motives. It is for this reason that I have come up with a list of things that we need to be "true blue and tight like glue" in our sister-friendships. This is written not because I have been the perfect friend, but because my motive is to be honorable. Nor did I write this because someone pissed me off or I have beef in a personal relationship. I was merely reflecting on some of my experiences and the experiences of a few I know. The list below is not exhaustive but it is a starter; some of us need a "how to" tutorial, so here we go. Real chicks and true friends:
1. Do not call your boyfriends, or someone you are interested in, for things they need. That way boundaries and lines are not crossed and situations are not confused. Besides, they should have their own men for that.
2. Do not really kick it around with cats who have been uber:mean to you. Whether or not that is your interpretation and not theirs--it does not matter. Remember: "He hurt you girl, let's get him!" That's the code.
3. Celebrate you because of the gifts of God in you, and since "iron sharpens iron" they are able to build you up and be built up by you.
4. Keep your personal life personal and do not make it fodder for other conversations or use it to amuse people. Your business is not show business.
5. Do not try to introduce chicks to people you are really interested in...or even slightly for that matter. Not cool, but is in fact, the penultimate hater move.
6. Rejoice when you rejoice and weep when you weep, and they do not give you sermonic pseudo-encouragement when you are going through.
7. Stand with you through rough times, and are not fair weathered; obviously they are not selfish. We all at times can be self-centered, but that is not the main characteristic of a true friend. It is a reciprocal relationship.
8. Can tell you the truth, confront you on your garbage, and love you while doing it because they want you to be who you really are called to be---awesome--and not solely for their benefit.
9. Do not behave in snake like manners so that you are always watching your back. If they got beef they can express it because they are mature enough to communicate.
10. Like you for who you are, but they are not going to let you walk around looking and acting crazy. Love is not endorsement for foolishness and unhealthy behavior.
What's missing? Add on and let's change some stuff...maybe even the world?
Sometimes it seems as if we have forgotten how to genuinely care for one another and have instead given over to jealousy, competition, and general foolishness on a-whole-nother extra level. I guess there are times when we need reminders that REAL friendship flows from true hearts and decent motives. It is for this reason that I have come up with a list of things that we need to be "true blue and tight like glue" in our sister-friendships. This is written not because I have been the perfect friend, but because my motive is to be honorable. Nor did I write this because someone pissed me off or I have beef in a personal relationship. I was merely reflecting on some of my experiences and the experiences of a few I know. The list below is not exhaustive but it is a starter; some of us need a "how to" tutorial, so here we go. Real chicks and true friends:
1. Do not call your boyfriends, or someone you are interested in, for things they need. That way boundaries and lines are not crossed and situations are not confused. Besides, they should have their own men for that.
2. Do not really kick it around with cats who have been uber:mean to you. Whether or not that is your interpretation and not theirs--it does not matter. Remember: "He hurt you girl, let's get him!" That's the code.
3. Celebrate you because of the gifts of God in you, and since "iron sharpens iron" they are able to build you up and be built up by you.
4. Keep your personal life personal and do not make it fodder for other conversations or use it to amuse people. Your business is not show business.
5. Do not try to introduce chicks to people you are really interested in...or even slightly for that matter. Not cool, but is in fact, the penultimate hater move.
6. Rejoice when you rejoice and weep when you weep, and they do not give you sermonic pseudo-encouragement when you are going through.
7. Stand with you through rough times, and are not fair weathered; obviously they are not selfish. We all at times can be self-centered, but that is not the main characteristic of a true friend. It is a reciprocal relationship.
8. Can tell you the truth, confront you on your garbage, and love you while doing it because they want you to be who you really are called to be---awesome--and not solely for their benefit.
9. Do not behave in snake like manners so that you are always watching your back. If they got beef they can express it because they are mature enough to communicate.
10. Like you for who you are, but they are not going to let you walk around looking and acting crazy. Love is not endorsement for foolishness and unhealthy behavior.
What's missing? Add on and let's change some stuff...maybe even the world?
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