All Matters of Dopeness (Musings and Comedy in Erie's World)

There’s a meme floating around social media that says,  “ When something goes wrong in your life, just yell ‘Plot Twist’ and move on .”                                    Cute, right? But in real life, we don’t always appreciate whimsical responses to our painful, unexpected moments. Change can be scary—especially when it’s the kind we never saw coming or had a chance to prepare for in advance.  If you’ve ever said, “I hate surprises,” then you know exactly what I mean. Plot twists are surprises, but not the fun kind. They’re the moments that flip your world upside down—the abandonment of a spouse, a separation or divorce, the loss of a parent, a health scare, a stressful family conflict, and abuse of any kind. Feelings of isolation or alienation can be plot twists, too. No one expects these experiences to become the main plot of their story. No one imagines that abuse and betrayal can m...

I admit I have trust issues. Let's be for real, folk are wildin' out here, cheating, lying, and a lot of them are simply shady. That's a given. Maybe its even par for the course, but its not the reason for my trust issues. My trust issues are with God.   I just know the extremely enthusiastic churchgoers are freaking out on me right now...lolol. (Y'all know, our brothers and sisters in Christ, who are hypervigilant over other people's faults, are probably reading with disdain at this point.) But if you are still reading, it’s true. I have major trust issues right now...with God. Now before you start rebuking this page, just hear me out. Sometimes I feel like if were to take a sort of satisfaction survey assessing how God has been moving in my life, kind of like on a Trust Likert Scale or something, the score would be pretty low depending on the day. I honestly do not remember a time in my life, where my trust in God took a hit like this. Well, maybe there was o ne o...

  Returning to Paris felt like a deep exhale. There’s a beauty to Paris that stays with you even after you are gone back home. It’s the beauty in almost every nook and cranny, the history hidden in plain sight, and music that seem to carry you throughout the day and night. This time, I wandered through Montmartre, surrounded by art and wonderment walking down the street, riding a carousel, and hiking up the steps to the Sacre-Coeur to attend service.  We took in the dazzling spectacle of the Moulin Rouge and still managed to pause, once again, and take in the beauty of Notre-Dame. We also visited the Ritz Carlton specifically to experience Bar Hemmingway (named after their legendary patron, Ernest Hemmingway) and also went to the Carette Cafe to drink the world's most exquisite hot chocolate. While these all seem to be certainly touristy activities, that view is based on one’s perspective. To me, it was more. They were more than tourist check off items—they were meaningful, G...

Its been years since I wrote on my blog, but her birthday is Tuesday, and its Advent . This year has been a particularly difficult one for me as I lost my best friend, my champion, my guide, my heart....my Mother, Minister Carolyn Burt . As I journeyed alongside her through her cancer fight these past few years, and as I now continue this life without her, I have navigated other painful circumstances simultaneously. I have had to face the aloneness of grief, the pain of harmful people who capitalize on other's vulnerabilities, the confusion about life as accomplishments are juxtaposed with pain, etc.... One can imagine how I struggled when asked to write a devotional article for this Advent Season. Yet, as I lean into the biblical text ( Isaiah 12 ), I am reminded that God is in the midst....even as we struggle. God is not merely a bridge over troubled water but a lifeboat in trouble water. God is present and actively involved in your circumstances as well as mine. I hope this dev...

The late comedian Richard Pryor once joked about his wife walking in on him having sex with another woman and his attempt to convince her that she was not seeing the situation accurately: "Who are you going to  believe ”, he asked hoping to confuse her, “me — or your  lying eyes ?" While it was just a joke and the audience probably got a good laugh from it, trying to convince someone that they did not see what they actually  did  see is a tactic used by manipulators to gain power and control. It’s abusive, and although the terms manipulation and abuse are not synonymous, it seems undeniable that they often go hand-in-hand when one seeks to gain or maintain power and control over another person. I recall being at a friend's house a few years back and stumbling upon the book, "The Art of Manipulation: How to Get Anybody to Do What You Want".  This book literally provides the "how-to's" of manipulation as well as the telltale signs for kn...